Wednesday, May 5, 2021

A Will to Live

We all have known someone who has received bad news that due to an illness, injury, etc, they only had a limited amount of time to live.  Some have given up due to the news, but then there is that percentage that tells the world "I am not giving up!"  Watch out world!  They were so determined that they outlived what the medical professionals had predicted.

The one person that I know who had the "will to live" is my sweet, precious nephew, Graham.  He has beat all odds and at the age of twenty-three he is graduating from high school.  To me he is the true definition of "success".

Even as a newborn, Graham had the "will to live".  When people tell you that newborns don't really hear or understand their surroundings, they are totally wrong.  Graham was born with the insight and direction that he needed to "survive" and to "beat all odds". 

I have shared Graham's story, but I want to share it again.  He was born weighing 6 pounds and 8 ounces.  He was the cutest baby with his ten toes and ten fingers.  At the time Graham was born, the mom and baby got to stay in the hospital for at least three days compared to now days.  The hospital stay went well.

After coming home, Graham cried a lot and also was not gaining any weight.  My sister, Terri, and brother-in-law, Gary, did everything in seeking medical advice and reading up on newborns.  The months grew weary on Terri and Gary in trying to care for their precious baby.

Four months later, Graham was scheduled for hernia surgery.  We all thought this was the answer.  He went into the hospital weighing 8 pounds and 2 ounces(this is four months later).  

The surgery went well.  But when they were trying to wake him up from the surgery, he went into a code blue.  For some reason, he wasn't able to swallow.  This is when all doctors and nurses got on board and began to do various blood work and run other tests to figure out exactly what the situation was.

After a few days, Graham was diagnosed.  He had a chromosomal condition that can be classified as a monosomy 21(a deletion of the 21st chromosome).  When he was diagnosed at four months, he was a "failure to thrive baby".  It was determined that he did not have the ability to swallow and manage food.  He had surgery to place a G-button for tube feeding, as well as a wrap on the esophagus to prevent reflux.

At this time, Terri and Gary were told that there were not really any other cases like him.  In the few that were similar, the babies died.  We were told that Graham would never walk or talk and that he would be severely retarded.

God had other plans for Graham and for the rest of our family.  Graham had such a "will to survive".  It is hard to imagine a four month old struggling for life, but he did.  He knew that he had the best parents that a kid could ever want and that the extended family would love him no matter what.

Graham has defied the odds.  He does walk and run.  He is delayed in speech and social skills.  He does understand everything you say.  I can remember feeding him after he came home from the hospital.  At 1 a.m., I would be rocking him and holding the milk up so that it would go through the G-button(this was before they had the machine that feeds him his milk now).  He would look up at you with those big brown eyes.  It was as if he was talking to you and thanking you for not giving up on him.  As you talked to him, he would hear everything that you said.  Maybe he couldn't respond, but you knew that he knew "how much he was loved".

Here we are twenty-three years later and we will watch him graduate from high school.  The school that he attends is exceptional.  When you are at the school, you feel the love that these teachers have given to their students.  They have encouraged and taught new things to them.  The teachers have also worked with the parents in guiding them into not being "helicopter parents", but to allow their children to try things.  Whatever their child does is perfect.

No, he will not work on Wall Street in New York or work in a office, but he can write his name; he can put the silverware into the drawer from the dishwasher; he loves playing on his laptop; he is a pro at English riding; he dresses up in many different costumes and he especially loves being with his mom and dad and family.  There is something about his hugs and kisses that puts a smile on your face.

I once read that success is "to be found in the way in which we live out our lives day in and day out.  It is to be found as we pursue what God calls us to be and to do.  Success is not the end of a process.  It is how we undertake the process called life".

Graham, you are a "success"!  You have shown myself and others what it means to live and to enjoy each day of life.  Thank you for having that "will to survive" so that I could be a better person!

Graham - Congratulations!

 

1 comment:

Jo-Anne's Ramblings said...

Some people are born survivors